/u/normelpersan's posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

With social distancing we'll have to figure out a way to high five each other without touching. A wi-five

232 upvotes

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Sorry, with the quarantine going on right now, all I have are inside jokes

192 upvotes

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Real moms look at their kids w pride thinking, "They're so smart & funny, etc I love them so much!"

178 upvotes

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So my grandpa tried to teach me how to milk a cow this morning.

175 upvotes

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I was 21 years old when I started watching friends, these cool older people who had jobs & a sex life and I thought, "I'll be 25 one day".

153 upvotes

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What do convicted fish drink?

146 upvotes

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"For motivation while jogging, I like to think about my ancestors and how our bodies evolved perfectly for running long distances.

142 upvotes

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Me: Tell me a joke

80 upvotes

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I apologize for the inconvenience, the ATM is out of service.

13 upvotes

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Being half black and half white, I have the entitlement of a white woman & the rage of a black woman.

12 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
With social distancing we'll have to figure out a way to high five each other without touching. A wi-five	232
Sorry, with the quarantine going on right now, all I have are inside jokes	192
Real moms look at their kids w pride thinking, "They're so smart & funny, etc I love them so much!"	178
So my grandpa tried to teach me how to milk a cow this morning.	175
I was 21 years old when I started watching friends, these cool older people who had jobs & a sex life and I thought, "I'll be 25 one day".	153
What do convicted fish drink?	146
"For motivation while jogging, I like to think about my ancestors and how our bodies evolved perfectly for running long distances.	142
Me: Tell me a joke	80
I apologize for the inconvenience, the ATM is out of service.	13
Being half black and half white, I have the entitlement of a white woman & the rage of a black woman.	12