/u/reallygoodbee's posts
[WP] You're dating an elf. On the drive to meet her parents for the first, she suddenly stops and grabs your arm. "Oh, crap. I told you I'm a princess, right?"
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[WP] This fairly innocuous-looking girl just beat up your entire martial arts dojo, by herself. When you asked why, she said one of your students was picking on her brother.
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[WP] There is a horrible, vicious monster that lives in the mountains. Every year on the first day of winter, a maiden from the village is sent into the mountain caves as a sacrifice. You never expected this one to return, much less dragging the monster's corpse behind her.
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[WP] You have achieved "Mu". The ultimate state of balance and perception. There is no fear, no hate, no love. There is only intent. The ability to act without attachment to emotion or thought. You walk into work, ready to begin.
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[WP] You have accepted the cooking challenge from the alien overlord: Create a truly satisfying meal or he destroys the Earth. Then he starts cackling, "You're not cooking for me, fool! YOU'RE COOKING FOR MY KIDS!!"
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[WP] Her skin is plastic and polyalloy steel. Her heart is an anti-matter fusion reactor. Her brain is a quantum hyper-computer. And she just said "Yes".
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[WP] "I ran the mess hall on the ship." "...The ship was unmanned." "Yep." "You made food for robots?" "Yep! They loved my chili."
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[WP] Humanity has spent years locked in a war against a hyper-advanced AI with an army of killer robots. Fighting alongside the humans is another powerful AI, originally built to play games and keep us company.
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[WP] "So we've been chatting online for quite a while, and, now, well, he wants to meet. But how do I tell him I'm really a brain and some organs inside a hyper-advanced metal exoskeleton with a chainsaw arm and a shoulder-mounted machinegun?"
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