/u/seaofdog's posts
[WP] You’re deaf, but you’ve been able to see subtitles since birth. One day while eating in your apartment: [SPAGHETTI SLURP] [FORK SCRATCHING ON PLATE] [FOOTSTEP BEHIND] [DAGGER UNSHEATHED] [HAHA JUST KIDDING]
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[WP] Cliches are outlawed in all forms. Consequently, media and speech are controlled by the government. Cameras are placed liberally and police watch the streets. A man approaches you. He says in a quiet voice, “Come with me if you want to live.”
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[WP] Gordon Ramsay has actually existed all throughout history, yelling at people for different things.
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[WP] In the afterlife, good deeds from your past are traded in for tokens. These tokens can be used to purchase benefits for your next reincarnation. When you arrive you’re excited, but soon realize that the tokens are in a state of hyper-inflation and are essentially worthless.
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[WP] By night, you’re a lousy vigilante who doesn’t get a second glance. But by day? You dawn your suit and tie and suddenly everyone knows your name.
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[WP] He was exhausted and red faced like he had just got back from a run, clearly in a hurry to speak to me. “Hey man, your going to freak out when you hear this!” “Don’t you mean you’re?” “Yah I guess, but anyw—— wait what?”
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[WP] You live in a room. It has no windows, doors, or vents and contains a bed, a toilet, and reappearing food and clothes. On the wall is a timer that has been counting down ever since you got there. When 1 hour remains, a door appears.
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