/u/snookiescookies111's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

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As agreed earlier, the guy who gets the shortest stick in the drawing of lots has to look for a way to feed the other 6 soldiers who survived the plane crash after an enemy rocket hit the aircraft.

7 upvotes

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We named him "William" after my girlfriend's dad who was a doctor.

6 upvotes

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I was laughing because fortune teller was wrong when she said earlier that I was going to die in a horrible car accident.

6 upvotes

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The funeral service ended with the head priest anointing the body with a sweet-smelling oil that is said to be of the same kind gifted to Jesus.

6 upvotes

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When the pale men in metal armor arrived, we knew that we were saved from the scimitar-wielding maniacs who invaded our village and decapitated all those who did not worship their god.

6 upvotes

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I became really happy when I discovered that the basement of the house we recenty moved in to was filled with rows and rows of bottles of fine wines and liquor, although they are a bit dusty and have some kind of fuzzy sedementation at the bottom.

5 upvotes

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I placed her on the table for an afternoon quickie.

4 upvotes

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She laughed and called me a pussy when I told her I don't like the idea of having a picnic at the local park because it is the site of the recent serial killings in our small town where the killer cuts off the victims' tongues when they were still alive.

3 upvotes

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What's really annoying is Mr. Jones is at it again with his unexpected midnight tuba playing in his room at the senior home.

1 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
As agreed earlier, the guy who gets the shortest stick in the drawing of lots has to look for a way to feed the other 6 soldiers who survived the plane crash after an enemy rocket hit the aircraft.	7
We named him "William" after my girlfriend's dad who was a doctor.	6
I was laughing because fortune teller was wrong when she said earlier that I was going to die in a horrible car accident.	6
The funeral service ended with the head priest anointing the body with a sweet-smelling oil that is said to be of the same kind gifted to Jesus.	6
When the pale men in metal armor arrived, we knew that we were saved from the scimitar-wielding maniacs who invaded our village and decapitated all those who did not worship their god.	6
I became really happy when I discovered that the basement of the house we recenty moved in to was filled with rows and rows of bottles of fine wines and liquor, although they are a bit dusty and have some kind of fuzzy sedementation at the bottom.	5
I placed her on the table for an afternoon quickie.	4
She laughed and called me a pussy when I told her I don't like the idea of having a picnic at the local park because it is the site of the recent serial killings in our small town where the killer cuts off the victims' tongues when they were still alive.	3
What's really annoying is Mr. Jones is at it again with his unexpected midnight tuba playing in his room at the senior home.	1