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/u/two_sentence_critic's posts

During our divorce I couldn't care less about the house, cars, or our other "marital assets."

42 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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The last few mornings I've woken up to hundreds of missed calls and voicemails of moaning, breathing, and a few screams.

41 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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First I check each door, then each window - they're all locked.

41 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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A terminal diagnosis was a difficult pill to swallow.

40 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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The knot in my stomach pulled tighter with each passing day and I knew if I didn't get a real meal soon I would die, again.

38 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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[July 2020] "Help me, I can't find the release latch and the water is rising fast," I said to the Second Mate.

36 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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"Detective Williams called, he said they found our Ashley," my wife yelled.

36 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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Hide and seek.

36 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceSadness
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Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy?

36 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceComedy
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I ran into the kid that bullied me back in grade school today.

36 upvotes • r/TwoSentenceHorror
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