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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

The witch put a curse on all the men of the world that states that the only thing that each man can hear from now on is his own voice.

67 upvotes • [deleted]
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I just heard about a tribe of people who worship the number zero.

67 upvotes • TheQuixoticTribble
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"You other girls better not be wearing white to this wedding," said the bride-to-be.

67 upvotes • JustAnotherYaoiFan
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Who does Mike speaks to when he feels unheard?

67 upvotes • Paperonthefloor
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I had one of those "went to school naked" dreams last night.

67 upvotes • Jellomortality
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I want this to be carved in my gravestone

67 upvotes • No_Competition7327
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"My next song, Perhaps Your Talents Lay Elsewhere , I used my final grades in college for the chord progression:"

67 upvotes • myfailedimagination
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Happy New year's!

67 upvotes • HunterSDeadguy
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Are you an ass clown?

66 upvotes • LiquidPenChamber1019
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Dark jokes are like food....

66 upvotes • Cozmic_Rebound
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