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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

I raced my girlfriend today.

60 upvotes • foodislouuu
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It's time for the crossover we all know elwe need.

60 upvotes • HunterSDeadguy
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You're probably wondering why I am not more upset about the shape shifter stealing my identity and life.

60 upvotes • Nevek_Green
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I was at a recent job interview when the interviewers asked me what my weaknesses were. I told them the truth.

60 upvotes • ohsopoor
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What do a cigarette and a hamster have in common?

60 upvotes • Ok-Orchid-3973
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"Alright, I've gone through the whole day without thinking about that one dumb thing and so far it's not so bad..."

60 upvotes • PupieDevil
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HAHAHA! FOOLISH MORTALS, THIS IS MY AGE NOW!!!

60 upvotes • pyramidCow200k
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mommy and daddy got me a gf for Christmas

60 upvotes • adolphinPewtin
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Time spent during lock down granted me some personal growth.

60 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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My inbox was flooded with comments relating to my post about explosives.

60 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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