/r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

I could see the look of horror pass over my boyfriend's face as I slid the knife in

678 upvotes • sugar-soad

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Today I tried something new and dipped my testicles in glitter.

668 upvotes • [deleted]

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“Daddy” my daughter said “can you check the closet for monsters?” I checked to make her less nervous, but in the closet, my daughter was hiding and said “don’t trust the thing in my bed”

664 upvotes • Mudkipfan

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I had no idea why my boss and co workers kept trying not to laugh during our zoom meeting

645 upvotes • sugar-soad

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Today my ex texted, “c u in Hell, asshole!!!!🔥😈🔥💀🔥”

629 upvotes • Vice-Monkey

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“You will die in seven days,” hissed the voice on the phone.

617 upvotes • ElZoof

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It began raining cats and dogs outside.

615 upvotes • SmellsLikeT00Nspirit

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I told my boyfriend that he had the biggest that I had ever seen, but had to explain to him that bigger isn't always better NSFW

610 upvotes • sugar-soad

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I already lost 10 pounds since I started training fencing

605 upvotes • Tramelo

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We lowered our grandfather’s coffin into the hole when another family group arrived with their own coffin, looking very confused towards us.

601 upvotes • Veloci-RKPTR

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Title	Upvotes	Author	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I could see the look of horror pass over my boyfriend's face as I slid the knife in	678	sugar-soad
Today I tried something new and dipped my testicles in glitter.	668	[deleted]
“Daddy” my daughter said “can you check the closet for monsters?” I checked to make her less nervous, but in the closet, my daughter was hiding and said “don’t trust the thing in my bed”	664	Mudkipfan
I had no idea why my boss and co workers kept trying not to laugh during our zoom meeting	645	sugar-soad
Today my ex texted, “c u in Hell, asshole!!!!🔥😈🔥💀🔥”	629	Vice-Monkey
“You will die in seven days,” hissed the voice on the phone.	617	ElZoof
It began raining cats and dogs outside.	615	SmellsLikeT00Nspirit
I told my boyfriend that he had the biggest that I had ever seen, but had to explain to him that bigger isn't always better NSFW	610	sugar-soad
I already lost 10 pounds since I started training fencing	605	Tramelo
We lowered our grandfather’s coffin into the hole when another family group arrived with their own coffin, looking very confused towards us.	601	Veloci-RKPTR