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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

A friend of mine kept using Axe instead of taking a shower

13 upvotes • Dashing_Steel
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American beer is like making love on a canoe.

13 upvotes • Rene_Coty_Official
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The pictures of my son flying through the air with his arms flapping like they were real wings would have made any parent's heart soar.

13 upvotes • GrimmRetails
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“I’ve always wanted to try a little wood carving!”

13 upvotes • IOughtToBeThrownAway
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My son asked why my old computer was heavier than his newer one

13 upvotes • dickcheney600
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I screamed in horror as red spread throughout the carpet.

13 upvotes • Power-Monkey
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The man slipped on a banana peel and we felt nervous that he's not getting up

13 upvotes • kaijisheeran
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What's the difference between you and eggs?

13 upvotes • janissary121
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What's the difference between me and trash?

13 upvotes • Tramelo
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Had to call the cops today there was a very good looking man in my bedroom.

13 upvotes • [deleted]
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