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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

Why is it so hard to find out what mental illness you have?

5 upvotes • Penntandem
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If you find yourself talking to your plants it's not necessarily anything to get nervous about...

5 upvotes • CKO1967
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I was always warned not to go in the basement

5 upvotes • Special_Branch_3982
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Politicians are like farts.

5 upvotes • Nevek_Green
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what do you call someone who pays for reddit premium...?

5 upvotes • [deleted]
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First Sentence.

5 upvotes • MissJubilee-
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Who's Bruce Lee's vegan cousin?

5 upvotes • [deleted]
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I had the grand opening of my 5 star restaurant yesterday and to my surprise one of the biggest food critics in the world attended and later kindly said that I put the "ooh" in food.

5 upvotes • [deleted]
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My boss keeps thumbtacks and nails with their paperclips that we always have to grab for paperwork.

5 upvotes • Prophetshark
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Some people cite John Cena as someone they would put on a Mount Rushmore of professional wrestlers.

5 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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