/r/WritingPrompts
[WP] Your cat routinely brings home half-dead animals that you tend to and release once they are healed. Last week, it brought home a bat. Now, you've found yourself nursing back to health a badly-wounded vampire that is not very happy with the situation.
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[WP] Harry Potter is now based in Australia. All spells are based on Australian Slang. Hogwarts is in Kakadoo. Dragons are dropbears and Voldemort is a cunt.
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[WP] The world has become so safe that no one dies in accidents. All disease is preventable. Natural disaster is eradicated. Even slight mishaps are unimaginable. You're the last remaining insurance salesperson and, goddammit, you've got quotas to hit.
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[PI] Genetics is everything. There are scales for wisdom, might, HP and mana, that are used on babies right after birth. You were born into an elitist family that discarded you after seeing your mana. What they didn't know is that you were the top 99.99% in dexterity, and you hold grudges.
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[WP] Moving into your new house, you find a note left by the previous owner: “Today, all of your neighbors will stop by throughout the day and offer you a lemon meringue pie. They will heavily insist that you eat it. Whatever you do, DO NOT EAT THE PIE.” As you set down the note, the doorbell rings.
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[WP] “One of the most frightening things I've ever heard was when someone pointed out that the existence of the uncanny valley implies that at some point there was an evolutionary reason to be afraid of something that looked human but wasn't.” - Twitter
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[WP] You work in a coffee shop. Every day, a man comes in with a little dog wearing glasses and a mini helmet and orders mocha with extra chocolate. One day, you realize the dog is controlling his mind and trying to poison him, but doesn't realize humans can eat chocolate.
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[WP] After great wars wracked the universe long ago, all species agreed to a pact. War would be fought with strict rules to prevent death and destruction. Earth was never told. Now, the invading aliens are confused as to why the humans refuse to sit out, even though the paintballs clearly hit them.
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[WP] You and your friends went camping to summon a major demon just to see what would happen. Now your Dad is standing in your glowing magic circle holding a cup of coffee and looking just as bewildered as you are.
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