/u/BlueAdmir's posts
[WP] The demon that tried to strike a deal with you was absolutely not prepared for the level of specificity you've prepared to make sure there are no loopholes for him to abuse.
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[WP] Our universe is in fact a simulation - it was a school project in God School. However, it was the one the got an A+ (top notch). Now tell me a story about living in a universe that got graded D- (barely above fail)
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[WP] You've always felt the wildlife on the tour were just a little bit too docile and the whole thing felt staged. You had no solid proof, until you've accidentally snagged a video of a tour guide splitting his tips with a gorilla.
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[WP] Aliens threatening to wage war on humans didn't realize their "unthinkable cruelties" and "military prowess" barely pass our bar for "mild hazing" and "skirmish practice"
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[WP] Your superpower ability is being able to subvert reality to use everyone's words against themselves. Not many get it at first, but after a taste of your power everyone fears Irony Man
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[WP] Your introduction pamphlet began as follows: "Peace is too boring. Would you like to read how there was 500 years of peace with no conflict? No? Thought so. That's why our Guild of Historians keeps pulling the strings to make it interesting."
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[WP] Since all of the 47 space-faring races in the Galactic Federation Forum are in pretty much constant conflict with each other, the newest addition - Humanity - becomes the de facto go-to conflict resolvers.
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[WP] The rule about challenging Death to a game of your choice was invented by Death itself. It's a pretty dull job, and the guy just wants a gaming partner.
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