/u/CreepyUncleDed's posts
[WP] Humans are the first sentients, putting us millenia ahead of aliens. Instead of acting like an "elder" species should, we create mysterious artifacts with no actual use, crop cicles and send spooky messages, like "be quiet, you are in danger" to the aliens, because we are still childish morons.
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[WP] "10 million slaves as tribute" the alien armada demanded. Less fortunate people were quickly rounded up, offered and taken. The aliens response: "We can only save that many and it was the fairest way to pick. The Scourge approaches, we are sorry." After that they hastily leave.
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[WP] You are a normal citizen in a relatively unimportant country. One day the goverment starts to act crazy, changing ideology overnight, drafting people for the army and antagonizing their neighbours. The player controlling your country in a strategy game has just begun their world conquest run.
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[WP] FTL travel is very expensive, so humanity creates a web of hyperlanes between systems, that speed up time inside them, making travel cheaper. You enter a malfunctioning hyperlane. When you leave it, you find a galaxy with no humans, full of alien races, that see your kind as ancient precursors.
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[WP] Pets are intelligent. Religious dogs worship humans as gods, while cats see us as a natural resource. You see your dog chasing away stray cats pestering you for food, not realizing he is a knight from the Order of Saint Good Boy protecting you from harvesters from the Cats Corporate Dominion.
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[WP] "It's simple, really. You just buy a haunted house for cheap from a desperate seller, finish the ghost's unfinished business - or deal with whatever it is keeping them bound to this plane - and then just sell the property for a profit."
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[WP] Earth is actually a psychiatric hospital, housing only one patient - Humanity, a hive mind with extremely severe multiple personality disorder.
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[WP] You are participating in a cosplay event, and many people are praising your excellent costume. Here's the fun part - you are not wearing a costume, you have no idea how you got here, and for some strange reason, half of the people here are dressed up as YOU.
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[WP] You are a mad scientist. You like to laugh maniacally alongside your hunchback assistant, while powering up your insane inventions. You also work in a hospital, saving countless people's lives, while leaving them slightly traumatized.
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[WP] You have been granted a wish from a genie. You ask him to send you back in time and make you powerful so you can prevent the genocide that happened in ww2. You forgot that genies like to twist wishes though. Now it's 1940 and to your horror you realize you are Adolf Hitler.
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