/u/IOughtToBeThrownAway's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

She was beautiful, and since she was asleep she couldn’t resist.

121 upvotes

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She closed the cookbook and sighed, “I just can’t decide on a recipe for you!”

121 upvotes

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He won’t stop complaining about the lack of sex and has even said we have the kind of relationship people complain about on r/deadbedrooms.

120 upvotes

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Lightning struck the building and made the pipes sizzle.

118 upvotes

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My neighbor had the nicest ass I’ve ever seen.

118 upvotes

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My wife wants to try again for a baby girl....

116 upvotes

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He heard the screams and saw the blood spray out on the lawn and he quickly shut the motor off....

110 upvotes

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I can't believe my disgusting whore of a girlfriend had the audacity to ask to get spit roasted. NSFW

110 upvotes

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“Dad look at how sharp this candy cane got from being in my mouth!”

106 upvotes

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She saw Death coming coming up the stairs and she begged, “please, don’t take me, I need to live to take care of my baby!”

102 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
She was beautiful, and since she was asleep she couldn’t resist.	121
She closed the cookbook and sighed, “I just can’t decide on a recipe for you!”	121
He won’t stop complaining about the lack of sex and has even said we have the kind of relationship people complain about on r/deadbedrooms.	120
Lightning struck the building and made the pipes sizzle.	118
My neighbor had the nicest ass I’ve ever seen.	118
My wife wants to try again for a baby girl....	116
He heard the screams and saw the blood spray out on the lawn and he quickly shut the motor off....	110
I can't believe my disgusting whore of a girlfriend had the audacity to ask to get spit roasted. NSFW	110
“Dad look at how sharp this candy cane got from being in my mouth!”	106
She saw Death coming coming up the stairs and she begged, “please, don’t take me, I need to live to take care of my baby!”	102