/u/Jjustingraham's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

"I'm so glad you've experienced childbirth," I chuckled to my wife, "now you know how much a man cold hurts!"

31 upvotes

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Hi, I'm Mike, the founder of Build a Better Body, an app that teaches you - in twelve short weeks - to build the body of your dreams!

29 upvotes

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I groaned in frustration at my wife's latest night terror, jamming a pillow over my head so I could fall back asleep.

28 upvotes

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.... . .-.. .--. -- . --··-- .--. .-.. . .- ... . ·-·-·-

25 upvotes

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My mom always used to say, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."

25 upvotes

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My wife and I have a very active, fulfilling, and kinky sex life, which I get that not all people understand.

24 upvotes

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I've gotten used to ignoring the buzzing in my head since the accident.

24 upvotes

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After my daughter was sent home with lice, I picked up the special shampoo on the way back from work and got her in the bath.

23 upvotes

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She trilled "Won't you be my neighbor" off-key while cleaning the dishes.

23 upvotes

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I could only gaze in mute horror as the shark materialized out of the gloom, hitting my diving partner in an explosion of blood.

23 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
"I'm so glad you've experienced childbirth," I chuckled to my wife, "now you know how much a man cold hurts!"	31
Hi, I'm Mike, the founder of Build a Better Body, an app that teaches you - in twelve short weeks - to build the body of your dreams!	29
I groaned in frustration at my wife's latest night terror, jamming a pillow over my head so I could fall back asleep.	28
.... . .-.. .--. -- . --··-- .--. .-.. . .- ... . ·-·-·-	25
My mom always used to say, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."	25
My wife and I have a very active, fulfilling, and kinky sex life, which I get that not all people understand.	24
I've gotten used to ignoring the buzzing in my head since the accident.	24
After my daughter was sent home with lice, I picked up the special shampoo on the way back from work and got her in the bath.	23
She trilled "Won't you be my neighbor" off-key while cleaning the dishes.	23
I could only gaze in mute horror as the shark materialized out of the gloom, hitting my diving partner in an explosion of blood.	23