/u/NefariousnessPlus292's posts in /r/Shittyaskflying

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I bought the shortest Ryanair flyte. 88 miles. From Malaga to Tetouan. My pylote took off and immediately decided to divert to Mexico because safety is his highest priority. Is he insane? And why are we flying like drunk people? Is that the Atlantic Ocean below the playne?

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I am a conservative pax. I feel safe on playnes because I know that my captain and FO are both promiscuous alcoholics, married, divorced, married, divorced, married... adulterers and more straight than other straight men. However, things are changing. How can I continue feeling good on playnes?

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Why playne making scary sounds? Is she trying to scare away bad people or just hormonal?

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Why is this playne making scary sounds? I tried to do a walk around but got really scared. Please advise next steps!

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Pylote calmly eats mango next to runway. ATC says there are seven trillion playnes before him. Pylote wonders why runway filled with playnes that cannot fly.

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I am really scared of boarding a boing and only buy ayreboss tickets. Unfortunately I must board a boing soon. I contacted their customer service and begged them not to kill me. They said they would give me a captain in stockings who flies with his feet. Boing is afraid of such pylotes and behaves.

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I am really scared of boarding a boing and only buy ayreboss tickets. Unfortunately I must board a boing soon. I contacted their customer service and begged them not to kill me. They said they would give me a captain in stockings who flies with his feet. Boing is afraid of such pylotes and behaves.

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I bought the shortest Ryanair flyte. 88 miles. From Malaga to Tetouan. My pylote took off and immediately decided to divert to Mexico because safety is his highest priority. Is he insane? And why are we flying like drunk people? Is that the Atlantic Ocean below the playne?	1
I am a conservative pax. I feel safe on playnes because I know that my captain and FO are both promiscuous alcoholics, married, divorced, married, divorced, married... adulterers and more straight than other straight men. However, things are changing. How can I continue feeling good on playnes?	1
Why playne making scary sounds? Is she trying to scare away bad people or just hormonal?	1
Why is this playne making scary sounds? I tried to do a walk around but got really scared. Please advise next steps!	1
Pylote calmly eats mango next to runway. ATC says there are seven trillion playnes before him. Pylote wonders why runway filled with playnes that cannot fly.	1
I am really scared of boarding a boing and only buy ayreboss tickets. Unfortunately I must board a boing soon. I contacted their customer service and begged them not to kill me. They said they would give me a captain in stockings who flies with his feet. Boing is afraid of such pylotes and behaves.	1
I am really scared of boarding a boing and only buy ayreboss tickets. Unfortunately I must board a boing soon. I contacted their customer service and begged them not to kill me. They said they would give me a captain in stockings who flies with his feet. Boing is afraid of such pylotes and behaves.	1