/u/Outside_Normal's posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

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Only show posts with narrations

Someone in the crowded cafeteria cried out "Duck, soup!"

179 upvotes

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"...so when my office crush asked me for a favor I automatically said 'yes' without really understanding what I was agreeing to."

177 upvotes

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I tried to explain that it was the chair but my friends remained unconvinced.

170 upvotes

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My son revealed he was a vampire when he bit into my neck and started to drain my blood.

167 upvotes

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I tried to stifle my snickering when I ordered the "flied lice" off the menu.

160 upvotes

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My sister slipped me a passage to recite for our mom's birthday that was full of "S" alliterations.

159 upvotes

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After losing to me — again — he went into graphic detail about the things he would do to my mother.

157 upvotes

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The conjoined twins were great at group activities.

155 upvotes

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The only thing my father ever gave me, his only son, was a name that would guarantee I'd be bullied a lot.

152 upvotes

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I remember one time my mother pulled that "pregnant turkey" prank.

152 upvotes

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Someone in the crowded cafeteria cried out "Duck, soup!"	179
"...so when my office crush asked me for a favor I automatically said 'yes' without really understanding what I was agreeing to."	177
I tried to explain that it was the chair but my friends remained unconvinced.	170
My son revealed he was a vampire when he bit into my neck and started to drain my blood.	167
I tried to stifle my snickering when I ordered the "flied lice" off the menu.	160
My sister slipped me a passage to recite for our mom's birthday that was full of "S" alliterations.	159
After losing to me — again — he went into graphic detail about the things he would do to my mother.	157
The conjoined twins were great at group activities.	155
The only thing my father ever gave me, his only son, was a name that would guarantee I'd be bullied a lot.	152
I remember one time my mother pulled that "pregnant turkey" prank.	152