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/u/cryptomelons's posts in /r/monkeyspaw

I wish I could catch little critters like rats and squirrels by throwing my testicles around with my whip-like ballsack

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I wish I could catch little critters by throwing my testicles around with my whip-like ballsack like in Pokémon

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I wish all the insane random thoughts I have becomes reality

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I wish all the insane random thoughts I have become reality

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I wish Japanese porn actors and actresses spoke English when doing porn

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I wish Hollywood would stop making science fiction movies based on old Japanese films

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I wish it was easy to have sex on a treadmill

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I wish I could have sex with an angel's halo

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I wish I could jump farther by ejaculating mid-air

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I wish that my pee hole was a vaginal slit so I could beat and fuck my penis at the same time

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