/u/loopymon's posts
[WP] “Sir!” Cried the alien captain. “We have returned from Earth! Our plan failed—the prostate threat is still real!” The alien commander frowned and turned to his troops. “We need an alternative to probes.”
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[WP] You are the captain of a space ship travelling near the speed of light. Despite the big “caution” sticker, you decide to turn the headlights on to see what will happen. Suddenly you hear a loud chime, and the words “SUPERLUMINAL TRAVEL UNLOCKED: +20XP” appear above your head.
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[WP] “Your wish is granted,” booms the genie. You look around. “But nothing’s changed?” The genie smiles. “Exactly.”
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[WP] Juan’s life completely changed the day he was selected to be class president. Almost overnight it seemed he was pressured to constantly save the world, defeat an evil villain, or fulfil a prophecy. It almost felt like he was now the Chosen One…
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[WP] The ancients named the stars based on the biggest threat in that stars’ solar system. You’ve traveled the galaxy and fought centaurs, scorpions, and bulls. Now it’s time to visit the Horsehead Nebula.
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[WP] A new translation of the Prophecy reveals that the Enemy is not the Dark Lord, but the Drake Lord. The Chosen One begins their journey by seeking the wise but humble seer known as Kanye.
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[WP] You stare horrified. Your mother in law, who you only just met, lies dead at your feet. A sign appears in the air in front of you: Tutorial Complete.
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[WP] In the month leading up to Christmas, the Villain made an army of snowmen on their lawn. Some claimed this was proof of the Villain reforming; others were more cynical. But when the snowmen came to life on Christmas morning, the Villain’s plans were revealed.
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