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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

My wife is 3 months pregnant.

23 upvotes • 86-Everything
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Rolling a joint at the age of 17 was magical.

23 upvotes • shakeythirsty
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Welcome to the Second Annual Cannibal Awards.

22 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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Basic bitches are so damn boring.

22 upvotes • saketho
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with the experiment, we found out that the angle of incidence is equal to angle of reflection

22 upvotes • No_Competition7327
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Having trouble with the translation, my foreign friend was either coming out as trans or maybe thought I was.

22 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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Gravity truly is an oppressive prick. NSFW

22 upvotes • LiquidPenChamber1019
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I was doing my math homework and fell from the real plane into the complex plane

22 upvotes • SliceLegitimate8674
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I ate moldy bread, then shit my pants.

22 upvotes • nervousfemme
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Seeking zen, I was intrigued when my hippie friend suggested healing crystals and light therapy.

22 upvotes • GuyAwks
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