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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

The scattered pieces foretold the worst case scenario

6 upvotes • soulzack
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Oh no my project is due tomorrow and I didn’t work on it!

6 upvotes • kingbaconboi
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What does eating ass taste like? NSFW

6 upvotes • Longjumping_Zebra_23
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You're bored at your friend's house, so you go and grab the small bag of extacy your backpack

6 upvotes • tetsmon
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I was gonna give her breakfast in bed....

6 upvotes • mydadsnameisharold
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I want to pitch a highbrow detective series about a cop who solves crimes with multiplication and a retired furniture salesperson who still makes furniture for a hobby.

6 upvotes • GrimmRetails
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If you were a font, you'd be extra fine print

6 upvotes • [deleted]
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If I don't stop making jokes

6 upvotes • Lorikeeter
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The Devil whispered "You are not strong enough to withstand the storm"

6 upvotes • Ravon_Hunter
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I had to get all Gilgamesh on some Sumerian dude the other night.

6 upvotes • HunterSDeadguy
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