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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

I don't know what's so hard about Cancer,

141 upvotes • DuskyPerson
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Now Trumps gone he can fulfill his promise

140 upvotes • [deleted]
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"Welp," he said as he unbuckled his pants, "at least a micropenis is good for something." NSFW

140 upvotes • GladCricket
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I tried to catch fog yesterday.

140 upvotes • 339jimmyr
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The man said to his smart home device "Siri, why am I so bad at keeping relationships together?"

140 upvotes • dickcheney600
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i started crossdressing after i asked myself 'what would Jesus do?

139 upvotes • wondererSkull
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I tried to sneak up on my roommate with a horn sound effect ready to go on my phone, and turned the volume way up

139 upvotes • dickcheney600
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My neighbours always listen to awesome music

139 upvotes • vilidj_idjit
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How do you keep a moron in suspense?

138 upvotes • [deleted]
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I shouted at my low hearing grandma that I wanted to join "The Boys"

138 upvotes • random-pizza17
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