/r/onionheadlines
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Trump's Team Alarmed At His Insistence That He Will Do His Stand-Up Routine For The Talent Portion Of The Election.
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Trump Campaign To Sell Smaller-Than-Average, Toadstool-Shaped Dildos So Followers Can Literally Feel Themselves Getting Screwed.
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After Telling Advertisers To "Go Fuck Yourselves", Elon Musk Files New Lawsuit Against Ad Industry, Announces "Governor Abbot Isn't The Biggest Pissbaby In Town, I Am!"
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The Recent Sense Of Panic In The GOP Finally Shows Signs Of Abetting As The Release Of Steve Bannon Draws Near, 'Steve Will Bring Back The Bat Shit Crazy That We Have Been Missing Lately' Say Leadership.
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J.D. Vance Indignantly Removes Butt Plug During Live Fox News Appearance to Emphasize He's Just Normal Guy with Perfectly Normal Punisher-Themed Butt Plug
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