/r/onionheadlines

Year:

TOO OLD?: TRUMP STARES OUT OF TRUMP TOWER WINDOW, MUMBLES SOMETHING ABOUT HOW 'I USED TO PISS OUT THIS WINDOW, NOW I JUST PISS MY PANTS.'

22 upvotes • SirBexley

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Trump Takes Credit For His Own Assassination Attempt, Complains That Camera Angles Were Just A Tiny Bit Off.

21 upvotes • Organic-Lie4759

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California Preemptively Bans J.D. Vance From All Furniture And Rent To Own Stores In The State

21 upvotes • BeastModeEnabled

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Trump Furious As More Americans Choose To Become Black.

21 upvotes • DrRoxo420

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Science to Donate Brain to Trump

21 upvotes • HonoraryBallsack

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Project 2025 To Reinstate Slavery

20 upvotes • Fun-Dragonfly-4166

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In Show Of Unity, Harris Campaign Take 500M Life Ins. Policy On Trump. "The GOP Should Be Not At All Ashamed And Disgusted To Select A Felon, Rapist, Fraudster, Defamer, Racist, Misogynist, Immature, Insecure, Narcissist... [Continues For 30 Minutes] And Great (Wink) Golfer As Their Best Example.

20 upvotes • issr

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After Pregnancy From Rape Remarks, JD Vance To Get Supporting Role In New Season Of The Handmaid’s Tale.

19 upvotes • Im_with_stooopid

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American Christians Certain Of "Heaven On Earth" Conditions - Once Finished Hating, Removing and Silencing Everyone Who Isn't Them

19 upvotes • yimmy51

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Lawyers Reassure Panicking Trump that Hypothetically Clogging Gold Mar-a-Lago Toilet Due to Totally Normal Human Diet Counts as Official Presidential Act

19 upvotes • HonoraryBallsack

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Title	Upvotes	Author	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
TOO OLD?: TRUMP STARES OUT OF TRUMP TOWER WINDOW, MUMBLES SOMETHING ABOUT HOW 'I USED TO PISS OUT THIS WINDOW, NOW I JUST PISS MY PANTS.'	22	SirBexley
Trump Takes Credit For His Own Assassination Attempt, Complains That Camera Angles Were Just A Tiny Bit Off.	21	Organic-Lie4759
California Preemptively Bans J.D. Vance From All Furniture And Rent To Own Stores In The State	21	BeastModeEnabled
Trump Furious As More Americans Choose To Become Black.	21	DrRoxo420
Science to Donate Brain to Trump	21	HonoraryBallsack
Project 2025 To Reinstate Slavery	20	Fun-Dragonfly-4166
In Show Of Unity, Harris Campaign Take 500M Life Ins. Policy On Trump. "The GOP Should Be Not At All Ashamed And Disgusted To Select A Felon, Rapist, Fraudster, Defamer, Racist, Misogynist, Immature, Insecure, Narcissist... [Continues For 30 Minutes] And Great (Wink) Golfer As Their Best Example.	20	issr
After Pregnancy From Rape Remarks, JD Vance To Get Supporting Role In New Season Of The Handmaid’s Tale.	19	Im_with_stooopid
American Christians Certain Of "Heaven On Earth" Conditions - Once Finished Hating, Removing and Silencing Everyone Who Isn't Them	19	yimmy51
Lawyers Reassure Panicking Trump that Hypothetically Clogging Gold Mar-a-Lago Toilet Due to Totally Normal Human Diet Counts as Official Presidential Act	19	HonoraryBallsack