/u/shakeythirsty's posts in /r/TwoSentenceHorror
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“When a person gets to be my age, your hair falls out, your teeth are rotten, your pecker don’t work and you have to wear a goddam diaper.”
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In 1972, when she turned 100, she told the amused reporters that her secret to long life was three Johnny Walker and Doctor Peppers a day.
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“It’s a good thing I’m not scared of spiders”, she laughed nervously from the bathroom, “or your shower curtain would have made me pass out. “
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I was at Arby’s filling up my cup at the fountain, and there was a bright flash like someone had just taken my picture.
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