/r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

Mark: "?"

303 upvotes • Tramelo

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"Who's a little cutie pie?" I cooed at my cat, who had just jumped on my lap during the conference call.

303 upvotes • BlueSunflowers4589

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I love to get up early in the morning and rearrange the furniture in my home, by moving it a few inches

303 upvotes • sugar-soad

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My father was adamant that I would never win a beauty contest and demanded a recount of the votes

302 upvotes • sugar-soad

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Never turn your back on friends from school

302 upvotes • abhijithvivek

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“Bloody Hell!” I groaned, stubbing my toe for the 28th time

301 upvotes • KailTheDryad

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I ordered a Scotch, but after a second called to the barkeep, "And bring me a double."

301 upvotes • weirdinchicago

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I was surprised that so many people screamed at me just for wearing a mask.

301 upvotes • [deleted]

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It has been decades... and still when I get together with old classmates, they cry about how ruthless I was in dodge ball.

301 upvotes • ouoiax

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They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away...

300 upvotes • This_Mind_Of_Mine

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Title	Upvotes	Author	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
Mark: "?"	303	Tramelo
"Who's a little cutie pie?" I cooed at my cat, who had just jumped on my lap during the conference call.	303	BlueSunflowers4589
I love to get up early in the morning and rearrange the furniture in my home, by moving it a few inches	303	sugar-soad
My father was adamant that I would never win a beauty contest and demanded a recount of the votes	302	sugar-soad
Never turn your back on friends from school	302	abhijithvivek
“Bloody Hell!” I groaned, stubbing my toe for the 28th time	301	KailTheDryad
I ordered a Scotch, but after a second called to the barkeep, "And bring me a double."	301	weirdinchicago
I was surprised that so many people screamed at me just for wearing a mask.	301	[deleted]
It has been decades... and still when I get together with old classmates, they cry about how ruthless I was in dodge ball.	301	ouoiax
They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away...	300	This_Mind_Of_Mine