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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

My parents yelled at me for making a mess on the bathroom floor.

11 upvotes • Character-Dingo8762
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I am constantly hounded by people asking me why I love grease so much - greasy food, greasy hair, greasy people, etc.

11 upvotes • Character-Dingo8762
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Yesterday someone broke my mood ring.

11 upvotes • bellias-smellias
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I was shocked that my penis started coloring orange.

11 upvotes • PM-for-bad-sexting
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I’d love to pay my ex her alimony in pennies but the Canadian government pulled the penny from circulation.

11 upvotes • cindybubbles
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Living in an elevator ain’t so bad

11 upvotes • mightykingbibis
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My friend said he lived in Kentucky.

11 upvotes • spectrejo
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I pooped in a chocolate Box and gave it to the neighbours

11 upvotes • Ultra-noob
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I may have to quit estate planning and probate law.

11 upvotes • cindybubbles
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I LOVE BTS MUSIC!!!!!

11 upvotes • huge_ass_johnson
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