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/r/TwoSentenceComedy

"The Earth is flat!"

209 upvotes • h0p3l3ssN1ghtm4r3
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Are you anxious and paranoid, especially about stalkers and home intruders? NSFW

209 upvotes • Raridan
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I'm going to attempt the trick of removing the tablecloth without disturbing the place settings perched on top of it.

209 upvotes • Outside_Normal
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For sale: two person tent, used once

209 upvotes • NoWingedHussarsToday
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I learnt how to swim the same way I learnt Engineering

208 upvotes • abhijithvivek
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You ever get so high you catch yourself understanding the president?

208 upvotes • HunterSDeadguy
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Ever since quarantine my sleep schedule is getting more worse and worse.

207 upvotes • Tramelo
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Do you know why everybody is REALLY buying up all the toilet paper?

206 upvotes • TheOminousDarkness
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“I wanna be Batman, no, wait, Superman!” said the young child to the genie.

205 upvotes • cindybubbles
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Day 18 my brother thinks the tv is possessed.

205 upvotes • patrick274727483735
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